How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?

[Rubel007]

Well, arguing in a household in my opinion is a common thing, in fact it can make a relationship more harmonious. However, what makes the difference is the level of the argument that causes it.

it is a common thing but one that should not be in my opinion i do not believe that everything needs to be made into an argument if both parties are open and honest then communication is possible without either one getting angry or emotional

If it is a difference of opinion or small things, I think it is good. However, if it concerns trust, then it is at a level that must be fixed immediately, because the problem will get bigger.

for every argument i think the trust gets chipped away no matter how big or small the argument is and the problems will just continue to arise for the longer you argue

It's common to argue with couples fight about money. It gets worse when one doesn't change after they talk about it and agree to stop gambling.

If a situation arises where wife is not willing to stop gambling even after getting the advice, then I would say that the situation is no longer normal. If a husband forbids his wife from gambling and she continues to gamble, then it should be understood that the wife is addicted to gambling. If there is no change after the husband forbids it, there is definitely no possibility of maintaining that good relationship between them. If the situation is bad, then there may be incidents like separation. But if the wife is able to convince her husband about her gambling that she is not an addicted gambler or that she does not use excessive money there, then the matter can be resolved through understanding. If she gambles without informing him or continues to gamble even after being forbidden, it will certainly be difficult to expect anything good from her.

[Sim_card]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

Why would it be in 5 years time that you will ask your wife for the money that was sprayed on your wedding day. Such funds should be forgotten about. However, it's not possible for you to be living with a gambler and not know that the person is gambling, because a gambler cannot hide his gambling habit for long especially, to his/her spouse living together.

[$crypto$]

Don't be surprised when someone's relationship becomes cracked because of betrayal, maybe even more than that. Yes, because it could be that if that happens, a relationship that was previously fine becomes a relationship that might forget that they previously knew each other.

Yes, well I will always say something , when a person betrays something is broken that can never be fixed again, something is lost , so when that happens there is nothing to do, maybe one lets it go, but the treatment will never be the same Again , personally if my partner does something like that, I don't think I would trust him or her Anymore, it would be very Uncomfortable, then one will not see that person with that respect , with that commitment that one can give , especially when it comes to money and addictions, which is what requires total support.

As I often hear, even though we can fix a broken glass, there will still be cracks left on the title, so once again this is something that is difficult to fix, maybe even impossible.

Therefore, we should not disappoint someone, because this will basically come back to ourselves, in other words what we are talking about here is also a reminder to ourselves not to betray something.

[SmartGold01]

As we know there's what we called courtship In a relationship and during that period you should be able to study your partner correctly to know how they are or what they are into before leading to possible marriage. Anyone who must marry must undergo this phase before getting married and whenever you undergo with that phase it makes it easier to understand your fiance hidden and open attitudes and you should keep records of every bit of each others so that whatever you don't understand you would leave or try to correct each others to be able to lead to effective marriage.

[LUCKMCFLY]

Therefore, we should not disappoint someone, because this will basically come back to ourselves, in other words what we are talking about here is also a reminder to ourselves not to betray something.

Well, I am a person who will Always be at a Level that they can get anything from me, I can even stop using something that I always use to give it to Someone if they need it, but the moment that person betrays me, that's it, that's all , that's my way of Being because I'm not a treacherous person, I am very clear about that, so in a case like the one in the thread and the subject , well, I am someone who would let that Person who hid that from me , because there is not and will not be a Greater degree of trust, not even with time, because in One way or another they will do it Again.

[Dr.Bitcoin_Strange]

First of all, it’s normal to feel disappointed in such a situation, there’s absolutely no one in such situation that wouldn’t feel disappointed, but this is one of the situations that tests your love for your partner. For me, if I tend to discover that my wife all of a sudden is a gambling addict, there’s absolutely nothing else I’d think of doing other than to assist and support her get over the addiction because I understand how addiction works and so I’d also understand that it wasn’t completely within her control and maybe things spiraled out of control.

[Didia Sofunichi]

the thrill of the double life.   this is the kind off story you will find in a TV show "who the bleep did i marry?"

i somehow wouldn't be surprise about wives keeping secrets. we all do have secrets. my wife doesn't even know i'm gambling online as well but sure thing i don't spend amount that she's be shock upon learning.

but if i learn my wife she's gambling and spend our emergency money, that's really something else. because this is where i will finally get even. if wives nags all the time about their husbands all because they forgot to throw the trash every collection day, maybe its time for me to do the nagging as well. see if she likes to be reminded every minute of the day.

Like you rightly pointed out, we all have secrets, some that we have even vowed to take to the grave. I think, though a personal opinion she should be given a second chance

[bitbit97]

It would be a total disaster, if that wife was gambling addict, gambling for 5 years and winning all the time (yet only during last year she has failed, lost and her secret became disclosed). How will you react if it turns out she was rich all that time, and managed to lost everything. And if it wasnt her last loss, she would continue secretly gambling. I think it will be awful to live all that time in such a lie. Once again money will ruin relationships.

[libert19]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

Addict? That's strong and I would feel greatly disappointed in myself that I didn't figure she's addict and myself handed over the money to her and what great use she made of it.

[$crypto$]

Therefore, we should not disappoint someone, because this will basically come back to ourselves, in other words what we are talking about here is also a reminder to ourselves not to betray something.

Well, I am a person who will Always be at a Level that they can get anything from me, I can even stop using something that I always use to give it to Someone if they need it, but the moment that person betrays me, that's it, that's all , that's my way of Being because I'm not a treacherous person, I am very clear about that, so in a case like the one in the thread and the subject , well, I am someone who would let that Person who hid that from me , because there is not and will not be a Greater degree of trust, not even with time, because in One way or another they will do it Again.

Honestly, I don't think about other people, I mean whatever they will do is beyond my control. I can't force them to always be able to do what I want.

But here the point is that we have to maintain it. I am a person who believes that something we plant, then something we reap. I mean when we betray others, then don't be surprised when one day we will be betrayed like that.

[DragonF]

As we know there's what we called courtship In a relationship and during that period you should be able to study your partner correctly to know how they are or what they are into before leading to possible marriage. Anyone who must marry must undergo this phase before getting married and whenever you undergo with that phase it makes it easier to understand your fiance hidden and open attitudes and you should keep records of every bit of each others so that whatever you don't understand you would leave or try to correct each others to be able to lead to effective marriage.

People can pretend for a long time, and they can also form new habits. It is not possible to learn everything about someone during courtship. A hidden habit takes one day to be discovered.

If courtship can cause a person to thoroughly study his fiance, there should be no conflict after marriage because they have gained a deep understanding of themselves, but this is not the case.

I have also seen people pretend to be good and overlook certain things, only to have those things become a problem shortly after marriage.

[SmartGold01]

As we know there's what we called courtship In a relationship and during that period you should be able to study your partner correctly to know how they are or what they are into before leading to possible marriage. Anyone who must marry must undergo this phase before getting married and whenever you undergo with that phase it makes it easier to understand your fiance hidden and open attitudes and you should keep records of every bit of each others so that whatever you don't understand you would leave or try to correct each others to be able to lead to effective marriage.

People can pretend for a long time, and they can also form new habits. It is not possible to learn everything about someone during courtship. A hidden habit takes one day to be discovered.

If courtship can cause a person to thoroughly study his fiance, there should be no conflict after marriage because they have gained a deep understanding of themselves, but this is not the case.

I have also seen people pretend to be good and overlook certain things, only to have those things become a problem shortly after marriage.

Yes you are absolutely right because most people can actually pretend for nothing good, but in relationship or marriage I don't see any reason for pretense because I see that whenever they pretended for each other there would always be an issues because with time every characters would definitely reveal themselves, and if that happens there would be dispute in the family where both wouldn't be that compactible anymore.

[Cryptsafe]

If she could hide this from you onset of courtship and into marriage then it is obvious that there are more things hidden that she is not saying. It would be a very disappointing situation because you can not trust her with funds again as a result of her gambling lifestyle. How would you feel after working you get paid and you give your wife money for the house and upkeep only for you to discover that the funds have been diverted for something else not even something that could be controlled but gambling addiction. It would be a big burden on the husband as there would no longer be financial trust between both partners.

[Didia Sofunichi]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

it's very funny,you having a wife to be a gambler your finished,her duty as a wife is to protect and save your money to handle the affair of your home,she been a gambler the home is on fire.

I agree, women are home makers and wealth nurturers but if you unfortunate to marry the opposite then you are on your way to self distruction, I will continue advising bachelors to know who their partner truly is before saying I do

[LogitechMouse]

As we know there's what we called courtship In a relationship and during that period you should be able to study your partner correctly to know how they are or what they are into before leading to possible marriage. Anyone who must marry must undergo this phase before getting married and whenever you undergo with that phase it makes it easier to understand your fiance hidden and open attitudes and you should keep records of every bit of each others so that whatever you don't understand you would leave or try to correct each others to be able to lead to effective marriage.

Yes, there's this thing called "courtship", and from that time, you will learn all of the traits of the girl/guy. That doesn't mean though that you will know EVERYTHING from him/her.

Like what others said, people can hide their true identity for a very long time, and I've seen relationships that are very happy in their first months or years but turned out to be miserable afterwards. The courtship period that you're saying isn't enough to know the other person 100% because as you get married, true identity will come up. It's just that, the wife that the OP shared is just good at hiding on what she's doing.