How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?

[pieppiep]

If she could hide this from you onset of courtship and into marriage then it is obvious that there are more things hidden that she is not saying. It would be a very disappointing situation because you can not trust her with funds again as a result of her gambling lifestyle. How would you feel after working you get paid and you give your wife money for the house and upkeep only for you to discover that the funds have been diverted for something else not even something that could be controlled but gambling addiction. It would be a big burden on the husband as there would no longer be financial trust between both partners.

In any relationship there is nothing as important as trust hence one being financially open with another especially where the finances will directly affect everyone. That is why, when one of the partners conceals some information that drastically affects family life, disillusionment and lack of trust are perfectly understandable. Every person would like to ensure that all the measures taken in the interests of the family are actually spent for what they are intended. If something is kept secret and only disclosed in such state then the emotions of anger and helplessness towards the financial situation and the entire condition of the household is not an easy thing to bear. Once it is lost, it will be impossible to regain confidence that similar situation will not manifest itself in the future. Finance is not only about calculation but it is about trust between the partners so that the ways of living together remain good without any mistrust or questions to each other’s honesty.

[SmartGold01]

As we know there's what we called courtship In a relationship and during that period you should be able to study your partner correctly to know how they are or what they are into before leading to possible marriage. Anyone who must marry must undergo this phase before getting married and whenever you undergo with that phase it makes it easier to understand your fiance hidden and open attitudes and you should keep records of every bit of each others so that whatever you don't understand you would leave or try to correct each others to be able to lead to effective marriage.

Yes, there's this thing called "courtship", and from that time, you will learn all of the traits of the girl/guy. That doesn't mean though that you will know EVERYTHING from him/her.

Like what others said, people can hide their true identity for a very long time, and I've seen relationships that are very happy in their first months or years but turned out to be miserable afterwards. The courtship period that you're saying isn't enough to know the other person 100% because as you get married, true identity will come up. It's just that, the wife that the OP shared is just good at hiding on what she's doing.

Do you know that dating someone is enough time to know and study people before courtship? Yes, courtship is just like completing the legal requirements of marriage to be proceeded, otherwise while dating someone you could used that medium to know and study about someone behavioral attitudes if they are suitable for you or not.
But however, we still have some men or women pretending for nothing good afterwards when the marriage has took place they began to unveil some things you shouldn't know for any reason.

[electronicash]

As we know there's what we called courtship In a relationship and during that period you should be able to study your partner correctly to know how they are or what they are into before leading to possible marriage. Anyone who must marry must undergo this phase before getting married and whenever you undergo with that phase it makes it easier to understand your fiance hidden and open attitudes and you should keep records of every bit of each others so that whatever you don't understand you would leave or try to correct each others to be able to lead to effective marriage.

Yes, there's this thing called "courtship", and from that time, you will learn all of the traits of the girl/guy. That doesn't mean though that you will know EVERYTHING from him/her.

Like what others said, people can hide their true identity for a very long time, and I've seen relationships that are very happy in their first months or years but turned out to be miserable afterwards. The courtship period that you're saying isn't enough to know the other person 100% because as you get married, true identity will come up. It's just that, the wife that the OP shared is just good at hiding on what she's doing.

Do you know that dating someone is enough time to know and study people before courtship? Yes, courtship is just like completing the legal requirements of marriage to be proceeded, otherwise while dating someone you could used that medium to know and study about someone behavioral attitudes if they are suitable for you or not.
But however, we still have some men or women pretending for nothing good afterwards when the marriage has took place they began to unveil some things you shouldn't know for any reason.

women are good at hiding things. they are born paranoid in my opinion, when you don't give a woman a sex by the time she wants it, she could come up a story in her mind that you just came out of a whorehouse. but they don't show how paranoid they are yet when you are courting her yet.

if you caught your wife being a gambling addict for 5 years, you can really tell she's doing it pretty good, she hid it all these years. thats something you can really say, she'd be a good undercover.

[LUCKMCFLY]

Honestly, I don't think about other people, I mean whatever they will do is beyond my control. I can't force them to always be able to do what I want.

But here the point is that we have to maintain it. I am a person who believes that something we plant, then something we reap. I mean when we betray others, then don't be surprised when one day we will be betrayed like that.

It's just that sometimes People's nature is like that, they have a tradition of being people that in my town they say are: "mischievous" so this type of people sooner or later will do it, even with their loved ones, I think that when someone Joins another person then they become very special, very impressive and they shouldn't do things wrong , So in view of this one has to be very careful when choosing their partner, do all kinds of tests, it's Preferable to do that during courtship to see what the reactions are like than to start living life and that's where Everything happens.

[Didia Sofunichi]

It will be a tough situation. It's already hard enough to earn money as the bread winner of the family and then you come home to take care of the groceries, utilities, and house bills. Instead of relaxing after a day/week's work, you still have to think about those things because you cannot trust your wife to handle money due to gambling addiction.

Ad tough as the situation may appear but what can one do. She's your wife after all but like you said she's no longer to be trusted and when trust is lost it can't be regained. You will just have to do your planning and budgeting independently

[Gurujebs]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

Find out? What happen during the courtship and dating time? There is no way you will see your wife do one or two hidden things and you wouldn't see some symptoms. If a person is a sport gambling addict, you should be able to see some sign that will tells you that indeed this person is gambling addict and with time, you will caught them.

If perhaps I don't know early and we get married, I will examine her gambling behavior if its not affecting her and then I will check also if she is making money or losing money. I will make sure she lose some interest too, you never can tell what will happen tomorrow.

[Cryptsafe]

If she could hide this from you onset of courtship and into marriage then it is obvious that there are more things hidden that she is not saying. It would be a very disappointing situation because you can not trust her with funds again as a result of her gambling lifestyle. How would you feel after working you get paid and you give your wife money for the house and upkeep only for you to discover that the funds have been diverted for something else not even something that could be controlled but gambling addiction. It would be a big burden on the husband as there would no longer be financial trust between both partners.

In any relationship there is nothing as important as trust hence one being financially open with another especially where the finances will directly affect everyone. That is why, when one of the partners conceals some information that drastically affects family life, disillusionment and lack of trust are perfectly understandable. Every person would like to ensure that all the measures taken in the interests of the family are actually spent for what they are intended. If something is kept secret and only disclosed in such state then the emotions of anger and helplessness towards the financial situation and the entire condition of the household is not an easy thing to bear. Once it is lost, it will be impossible to regain confidence that similar situation will not manifest itself in the future. Finance is not only about calculation but it is about trust between the partners so that the ways of living together remain good without any mistrust or questions to each other’s honesty.

Trust is the basic foundation on which relationships are built. It is very precious and treasured by partners because they see it as a kind of irreplaceable factor in the relationship and something they can hold onto for each other without minding the outcome of situations as it presents itself and when broken is hard to regain. Trust is not something to joke or play with because it has made people and destroyed many people's relationships.

If someone can not be trusted with funds as a partner then there is a big issue in that relationship because finance has a big role to play in every aspect of a relationship and to be frank, as little as any funds given to a partner, it must be accounted for because every penny counts when it comes to family spending and expenses as no one would be happy to hear that their money is been spent recklessly for something that could be controlled to some limit.

[Rubel007]

Honestly, I don't think about other people, I mean whatever they will do is beyond my control. I can't force them to always be able to do what I want.

But here the point is that we have to maintain it. I am a person who believes that something we plant, then something we reap. I mean when we betray others, then don't be surprised when one day we will be betrayed like that.

It's just that sometimes People's nature is like that, they have a tradition of being people that in my town they say are: "mischievous" so this type of people sooner or later will do it, even with their loved ones, I think that when someone Joins another person then they become very special, very impressive and they shouldn't do things wrong , So in view of this one has to be very careful when choosing their partner, do all kinds of tests, it's Preferable to do that during courtship to see what the reactions are like than to start living life and that's where Everything happens.

It would be good if there was a way to understand those things in advance. In some cases, if there is a long-term love relationship, a boy will know a lot about his girlfriend, but if a girlfriend hides something, it is not easily revealed. Therefore, it is not possible to get a completely correct idea until those mistakes are exposed. How each husband views his wife will depend on that husband. But if this happens to me, I will definitely not be able to trust her completely, particularly money related matters.

[milewilda]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

I will directly be that not wanting to pursue out the wedding. Period.
Come to think that you have planned about your wedding with her, but ending up for those funds to be used on gambling? That would really be a total irresponsible act by someone who do make out such action because we do know that when it comes to decision making then it will be that impossible that you cant be able to determine on whats good and whats bad. Im not saying that i cant forgive but it would be wise that you should be leaving her because she didnt thinking about your planned wedding but instead she give out that priority to gambling.

[pieppiep]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

I will directly be that not wanting to pursue out the wedding. Period.
Come to think that you have planned about your wedding with her, but ending up for those funds to be used on gambling? That would really be a total irresponsible act by someone who do make out such action because we do know that when it comes to decision making then it will be that impossible that you cant be able to determine on whats good and whats bad. Im not saying that i cant forgive but it would be wise that you should be leaving her because she didnt thinking about your planned wedding but instead she give out that priority to gambling.

It is never easy to let go of a particular relationship but that is ‘in some occasions or instances the trust extended has to be protected. If a person decides to neglect the commitment which was established between two parties, it is evident that such a person has different priorities. In this case, having a relationship means that one has to be ready and willing to take responsibility and be mindful while making decisions, especially those that have to do with the future of the relationship. If the mistake that occurred implies that something that should be properly maintained is being sacrificed, then analysing the decision of separation would be healthier in terms of psychological and monetary.

[$crypto$]

Honestly, I don't think about other people, I mean whatever they will do is beyond my control. I can't force them to always be able to do what I want.

But here the point is that we have to maintain it. I am a person who believes that something we plant, then something we reap. I mean when we betray others, then don't be surprised when one day we will be betrayed like that.

It's just that sometimes People's nature is like that, they have a tradition of being people that in my town they say are: "mischievous" so this type of people sooner or later will do it, even with their loved ones, I think that when someone Joins another person then they become very special, very impressive and they shouldn't do things wrong , So in view of this one has to be very careful when choosing their partner, do all kinds of tests, it's Preferable to do that during courtship to see what the reactions are like than to start living life and that's where Everything happens.

I myself will not justify that everyone should not make mistakes, because as a human being I think it is natural when we make a little mistake.

However, the point here is how big they made the mistake, and if it is related to the context of this thread then it is concluded that this is a very big mistake. Because just imagine for that long not being honest with his partner.

[LUCKMCFLY]

It would be good if there was a way to understand those things in advance. In some cases, if there is a long-term love relationship, a boy will know a lot about his girlfriend, but if a girlfriend hides something, it is not easily revealed. Therefore, it is not possible to get a completely correct idea until those mistakes are exposed. How each husband views his wife will depend on that husband. But if this happens to me, I will definitely not be able to trust her completely, particularly money related matters.

Yes, and it is very difficult because if you are with someone, then they have the right to know how the money and everything will be handled, but I start from something, if they did something like that with money, then they are capable of doing anything else even without money and things that can be very evident with respect to betrayals, and that is something that Cannot be lived in peace, or at least there is always that thing of mistrust, as long as there are all those things, a Relationship can hardly prosper, I mean, it would not make sense to be in a relationship of that style, that's how I see it.

[Didia Sofunichi]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

it's very funny,you having a wife to be a gambler your finished,her duty as a wife is to protect and save your money to handle the affair of your home,she been a gambler the home is on fire.

Yes, women are designed to protect and manage wealth prudently. Your house is really on fire if she does otherwise. Men should be very careful so they don't get their life ruined

[SmartGold01]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

I will directly be that not wanting to pursue out the wedding. Period.
Come to think that you have planned about your wedding with her, but ending up for those funds to be used on gambling? That would really be a total irresponsible act by someone who do make out such action because we do know that when it comes to decision making then it will be that impossible that you cant be able to determine on whats good and whats bad. Im not saying that i cant forgive but it would be wise that you should be leaving her because she didnt thinking about your planned wedding but instead she give out that priority to gambling.

I think before anyone takes drastic or rash action they should also put themselves in that shoe to know if they where one what would they do as well. Look, realistically I don't know how you may see this from your angle but it's something to call to order because if it was the wife who discovered this from the husband do you think she would run away or she wouldn't proceed marrying again?

No, I don't think so and if you both loves each others there are ways to work out things in both favor, and besides gambling is not a bad habit the problem there is when a gamblers has turned it into a habit or such as an addiction then we can call it to reason fine and restrict such person from gamble or associating themselves that much with the casino.

[Chilwell]

How will you feel if you find out that your wife of 5yrs is a gamble addict?
A lot of gamblers tend to conceal their gambling escapeds. After years of success marriage, love and commitment you ask your wife to bring the money you were sprayed during your wedding that you asked her to keep and she opened up to you how gambling has drained the money.

What will be your reaction?

As a good and observant husband, how I will you be with your wife for five good years and you wouldn't know that she is addicted to gambling. Her reactions will speak it all. Two years is more than enough to study someone including his or her habits and everything. Is not every husband that will be able to forgive her, must especially if he has planned something big for the money. But in case like this, i will give her a second chance to know if she is going to change. Because what will happen has happened and nothing can change that.